I was recently teaching a Reiki class to a very nice group of women.
But, before I go on, I should tell you that the most rewarding aspect of my Reiki classes is the interaction, the closeness that happens between all of us. We usually start with an activity that helps create a safe space: one in which there is confidentiality, acceptance, and respect and people take care of their own needs. By the end of a 12-hour class (Reiki I is intensive, I know) most people have opened their hearts and experienced what it is to be supported and connected.
So, this group of women… after each activity, we sit and reflect on the experiences and make space for questions and answers. The subject of becoming Reiki Masters and teachers came up. Someone asked how to replicate, expand, multiply the kind of closeness, intimacy, and support experienced during the day. I said, “What you do is you all become Reiki Masters and teachers and pass on this gift of Reiki to other people.”
I’m not new to the hesitation most people experience about teaching others. We tend to doubt ourselves. Would others listen to us? Do we have the authority to teach others when we still feel “incomplete,” “flawed,” or “in the process of becoming”? And I think the answers are Yes, yes, and yes. We complete ourselves in the interaction with others. We build ideas as we speak and wisdom comes out (Dr. Paul Gilbert defines wisdom as knowledge + insight). We allow others to see our vulnerability and trust them, understanding that our vulnerabilities are the place from which they can empathize with us. We become (whatever we want to become) thanks to the collective wisdom that inspires us, moves our heart, motivates us to move forward, opens our eyes to new experiences.
So, then the group wanted to discuss the Reiki principles a bit further. I have already talked elsewhere about the other Reiki principles: Don’t anger, Don’t worry, Give thanks for your blessings. Another of the five principles is “Working hard on self” and this one brought quite a few questions. No, we don’t want to be hard on ourselves, that’s not the idea.
There is the perfectionist kind of hard, I said. A person who will never feel enough and will judge others by the same measure. And then, there is the honest person kind of hard. I provided a personal example: I hate mediocrity and yet I’ve come to recognize that sometimes I don’t try my best because what I do seems good enough to many.
So, I need to be true to myself. I think it’s easy to fall into what Edward de Bono called the “intelligence trap:” if we’re somewhat smart, we might be tempted to using our quick thinking to defend or postulate ideas (and we might have the ability to do so nicely), rather than further exploring those ideas and subjects until we really acquire a deep knowledge of what we’re talking about. Once I become aware that I’m doing this, I have the obligation to “work hard” on getting out of the above-mentioned intelligence trap, and conscientiously study and keep myself up-to-date on the topics I’ll be teaching, writing, and discussing.
So, the goal of “working hard” is not to be perfect, but to be honest: to be fully aware of our potential, our weaknesses, our flaws, until we get to know who we truly are. And we’re certainly not what we do nor what we achieve nor what we have.
We spoke about two kinds of doing: there is what I do in order to have (possessions, titles, position, recognition) and this kind of doing doesn’t really lead to satisfaction, fulfillment, or joy. And there is the doing that becomes the expression of my truest being and this doing is pure joy on itself.